3.10. Chronic deprivation, self-sabotage, psychosomatic illness, and abuse dynamics
This podcast episode explores the concept of chronic self-deprivation and its roots in childhood neglect. It discusses how unrecognized personal needs can lead to self-sabotage, psychosomatic illness, and codependency. The episode offers insights into breaking these patterns by identifying and fulfilling a comprehensive range of human needs, emphasizing the importance of self-care in trauma recovery and personal growth.
NVC shame, parts, and major points with Shelby | MFs Speak!
Today let’s take a relcalibration break to hear the other major points hidden in NonViolent Communication. Straight from the person who introduced me to NVC.
*NEW* BONUS – Building Community – Reflection Qs From NVC Ep 7
Trying a new thing! Leading your reflections and opening space for new community building! ~~ Get your Reflection Qs from the NVC #7 Workbook, in audio form ~~ Hear me clarify, expand, and rephrase questions. Helping you to get the most out of your trauma archeology...
Self-sabotage and your needs
If we deprive ourselves long enough? The SUB-C starts looking for new means of getting our needs met. Let’s whiteboard about it.
BONUS – Identify your hidden vs. over-emphasized needs
If we’re masters at masking our own needs so recovery becomes impossible… how can we start to figure out the ways we’re depriving ourselves?
Concept Introduction: Coercion, control tactics, abuse programming, and family need enmeshment
How do deprived and “unallowed” needs connect with our accrual of CPTSD and abuse-acceptance? Let’s talk about our FOO’s coercive control tactics for ~13 minutes.
7. Self-sabotage and psychosomatic illness V. your SUBC shittery | Important Workbook!
Notes: We have rigid rules about what needs are “allowed” for us in normal circumstances. Those rules often create webs of mandatory needs related to the original over-satiated needs. i.e. rigidly over-exercising -> medical needs, nutritional needs,...
Clarification! Conscious vs Subconscious Need Fulfillling Behaviors
Just a quick point to drive home several times over. No, you’re not CHOOSING self-destruction. Check “Nobody should believe me” wherever you podcast.
7. Deprived Needs, the SUB-C, Self-sabotage and Psychosomatic Illness
So we love to deprive ourselves “for goodness” – but what happens when your subconscious has enough? Today, talking about ways our SUB-C connives against us, creating extraordinary circumstances that allow us to fulfill our “unallowed...
Mini BONUS | Self-abuse Words, NVC, and IFS
So we just finished looking at precise & accurate emotions… ARE there any instances in which “false, projected feelings” are valid? Can self-abuse words be helpful? And how does that concept connect with our parts work ala IFS?
BONUS Breaking the spell of feeling “neglected, ignored, and rejected” – Naming your real feelings and needs
The title says it all? We learned that “projected, false, judgmental” emotional words are a big part of our vocabularies that holds us back. So, let’s redefine those words and pull meaning from them. What are we REALLY trying to say and how can we...
6. “Secondary” Needs and Emotions; Chronic Self-Entrapment
How do we mask our needs from ourselves, fruitlessly dumping energy into areas of life that won’t return any chemical pr physical reward? Lettuce talk about what I’m calling “secondary (preferred) needs” – as they relate to...